Kiah! I'm so excited you found my blog! Now maybe you should join and follow it and maybe create your own blog so I can read about ur life! lol And I also want to thank everyone else who has joined so far for joining. Is there anything going on that anyone would like to talk about? Today was more of a difficult day food wise. A friend of mine got sick at lunch today and as terrible as this sounds, it really triggered me. I feel bad saying that because I should be more concerned with how she feels. But then again I know that it's not good to "should all over ourselves" but ya know, I just feel bad, and honestly really stupid, that something like that would trigger me. Because she was so obviously just not feeling well and not trying to be triggering in any way, shape, of form. But it kind of reminded me of a time when I was in the Alexian partial program, where this awesome kid who I was really good friends with got sick right after lunch in meal processing group. He literally just puked into his cup that he was holding and it triggered a lot of people. It especially triggered one girl who was also my good friend. She was right next to him and saw everything happen. And I felt really bad. No one knew if he had done it as a compensatory behavior but was saying he felt sick to get rid of food he felt guilty about, because obviously if you are a patient on an eating disorder unit, you are not usually trusted with things like that. It made me think back to those hospital days. Surprisingly, I don't miss them but I do miss the people. And I don't know. Just makes me realize that there are so many thigns that I don't feel like I have the right to feel which furthers my self-criticism. How do you all deal with feeling guilty about certain feelings? (if that makes any sense)...and how do you deal with big triggers, or even smaller ones?